By Tunde Odesola
Fleeing from death’s machete blow, 18-year-old Ikemefuna runs towards Okonkwo for protection, crying, “My father, they have killed me!” Rather than look away as the blood-dripping innocent boy struggles in the jaws of destined death, a frightened Okonkwo raises his own sharp machete and hacks him to instant death!
In the world of Chinua Achebe’s Things Fall Apart, two fears terrify Okonkwo; ‘the fear of failure and of weakness’. Okonkwo could choose not to participate in the killing of Ikemefuna, who is the peace offering by the people of Mbaino village - for killing a daughter of Umuofia.
One of the oldest men in Umuofia, Ogbuefi Ezeudu, visits Okonkwo and advises him not to take part in the impending killing because Ikemefuna has become fond of him. The ‘poor lad’ even carries Okonkwo’s stool and goatskin bag while accompanying him to ‘big village meetings or communal ancestral feasts’. But in the very hour that tests mortal reliability, Okonkwo fails Ikemefuna, choosing to glorify his perceived manliness over the life of the luckless boy.
After he kills Ikemefuna, the halo lighting up the path of Okonkwo’s chi to great personal achievements extinguishes, and he begins a descent into disgrace and disfavour. The story of Okonkwo and Ikemefuna is still told till today in Umuofia and beyond.
Like Okonkwo is to Umuofia, Major General Muhammadu Buhari (retd) is the reigning superhero of Nigeria. Buhari is even much more, he is an ancient ruler of a modern society. And like Ikemefuna ran to Okonkwo for protection, thousands of Nigerians trapped overseas have called on the Father of Nigeria, Buhari, to help evacuate them to their fatherland, following the global outbreak of the coronavirus pandemic and its attendant lockdown. Just like Okonkwo, Buhari has stabbed a dagger into the heart of the entrapped, pleading and helpless Nigerians abroad, ruthlessly showing that his regime doesn’t care two hoots about them.
Chairman/CEO, Nigerians In Diaspora Commission, Abike Dabiri-Erewa, bared Buhari’s fangs last week when NIDCOM said stranded Nigerians abroad must test negative for coronavirus before the Almighty Federal Government can evacuate them from various countries abroad.
Since aunty Abike dropped the bombshell, many Nigerians have been annoyed with the reach of her wisdom and the richness of its brutality. But I disagree with Nigerians calling the Buhari regime soulless. Some of those who are criticising aunty Abike derived their reasoning from the African proverb, which says, “If someone is sent a slave errand, s/he must deliver it with discretion.” Again, I disagree because when you work for a Presidency as unaware and as clannish as Buhari’s, you need to constantly show yourself as overly busy, fetching water with a basket and sweating in the rain, otherwise, you would be forgotten.
Lest aunty Abike be seen as a sycophant, I must hastily rise to her defence by saying that there’s a world of difference between the deception called governance in Nigeria and the patriotism that birthed those her awesome Sunday-Sunday reports on the Nigerian Television Authority programme called Newsline.
But as Alhaji Buhari and Alhaja Abike are not Christians, they could be excused for being unaware of the biblical parable which teaches that the good shepherd leaves his 99 sheep and goes in search of one sheep that is missing. Moreover, the prevailing parable in Nigeria today is ‘every man for imsef, God for all’.
To have participated in torpedoing democratic and military governments, a soldier must be violent and brutal. Speaking through Abike’s commission, Buhari thundered at Nigerians stranded abroad, “You MUST get tested for the Virus in your country of residence and be issued an Authorised Health Clearance Certificate attesting that you are COVID-19 free. This Certificate MUST be presented and authenticated by officials at the Airport in your country of departure before you are allowed to board the Aircraft.” This sounds like an order from a major-general to bloody civilians.
Aunty Abike, who confirmed Buhari’s position via a tweet, justified the stance of the ex-military dictator-turned civilian President, adding that to qualify for evacuation, stranded Nigerians willing to come back home must be ready to bear the cost of their air fares. Aunty Abiksy said this in response to a tweet from a Nigerian, Adeolu Anthony Olagunju, who is stranded in the US. Olagunju said, “Dear Madam, we have been instructed to go for a COVID-19 test before we can be considered for evacuation from the United States. This is both sad and shocking to us considering that we are visitors in the US with no access to any health and social care benefits.”
Nigerians and their wahala! Some Nigerians are even saying that a responsible government should think before speaking. They say the government should know that most Nigerians stranded abroad have return tickets and that what the government should do is to first have an idea of the number of stranded Nigerians with return tickets. These troublesome Nigerians say the government should then liaise with the airlines through its embassies, as other responsive governments across the world have done, with a view to having the airlines airlift concerned Nigerians.
Nigerians and unbelief. I can see the noses of many of them twitching in mockery and their mouths sniggering in ridicule, saying the Buhari regime isn’t truly sincere about evacuating Nigerians. I can see another set of Nigerians, mainly the young, singing and dancing, “E don happen, I don tell am. Motor don jam am,” as soon the government mouthed its unauthenticated desire to bring Nigerians back home.
God enthrones kings, I know. But many Nigerian don’t. I overheard some of them arguing that since COVID-19 test result is time-barred, conducting a test and waiting endlessly for the Buhari regime, which has been unspecific with evacuation date, is tantamount to futility because by the time a plane would arrive, the test result might have exceeded its 14-day validity which is the gestation period of the virus. If Nigeria could allow into the country Chinese medical personnel during a lockdown and also allow countries of the world to evacuate their citizens during the same period, nothing stops Nigeria from requesting such a gesture from foreign countries if Buhari is sincere, they argue. Some of them even swore to high heavens that President Buhari would have evacuated stranded Nigerians abroad if a handful of them were Hausa-Fulani.
I also read the lips of Nigerians as they ask a question: Why did the Buhari regime leave Nigerians stranded in South Africa before Air Peace Chairman, Allen Onyema, came to their rescue after the September 2019 xenophobic attack? They also ask, “If Aisha, Zahra, Yusuf, Fatima and Halima were stranded abroad during this pandemic, would Buhari demand a negative coronavirus result as a condition to bring them back?”
For those that condemn Nigeria for being the only country demanding negative test results from her citizens before they could be welcome back into their fatherland, I wish to remind them that Nigeria is the only country in the whole wide world with the fastest thinking, most dynamic, absolutely charming and creative President ever. The completed Lagos-Ibadan Expressway, 4th Mainland Bridge, 2nd Niger Bridge, Kaduna-Calabar standard gauge railway, uninterrupted power supply, well equipped hospitals and schools etc are the evidence of the CHANGE promised and delivered by the ex-gunner.
If Buhari demands a negative COVID-19 result as the visa needed by his countrymen to gain entry back into their fatherland, why does he need to quarantine them in Nigeria for 14 days after a few hours’ flight and after foreign hospitals have given them a clean bill of health? Are the airplanes he’s sending going to infect them?
Personally, I won’t like it if the Buhari era is only popular for its effectiveness in timely churning out condolence messages even before the dead exhale their last breath. But Buhari will always be Nigeria’s standard measurement for drabness.
Written by By Tunde Odesola and first published in The PUNCH on Monday, April 13, 2020). Email: tundeodes2003@yahoo.com
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